have you ever...

...wanted to record something your child did (write it/type it/text it/etc.), got distracted by your child, then totally forgot the cute thing they did that you wanted to record? i'm still trying to remember what Gee did earlier today that i wanted to write in her baby book. :/

...finished one task in a series of many tasks with such a feeling of accomplishment that you struggle to start on any of the other tasks because you feel too "done"? that has to make sense to somebody. the autobiography is complete; 7 neat, 1.5-spaced, 0.75-margined pages of my life. but now i have to edit it. and send it to other people so they can help me edit it. then i have to revise my resume. then i have to send out recommendation forms...o-m-jeez. [however, procrastination is apparently the best friend of this blog. lol.]

...been faced with a decision like this: keep someone in your life that you love Love LOVE and who love Love LOVES you (but who is also quite capable of draining you of energy and light and happiness) OR let that someone go and try to find someone who you think can make you happier (yet you still think about the first someone every single day, several times a day). i don't know that i really believe in 50th chances. i do believe that love sucks, though. lol.

...heard that cry over the monitor and fleetingly wondered what your life would be like without the little person behind the cry, then immediately felt foolish (because you can't change the past) and guilty (because you love that little person with all your heart)?

...been so deeply depressed that you shut yourself away from the world, emerging only for the necessities, communicating on a regular basis with only 4 or 5 people, barely eating, watching TV show after TV show in order to escape the inescapable and ridiculously sucky reality of your own life?

...trudged through your day to day life with no direction, no ambition, no long-term (and barely any short-term) goals until a light from heaven shines and you hear the choir of angels sing as you have that AHA! moment in which you figure out what it is you're supposed to be doing?

...been so naive that when your veil of ignorance is lifted, you just want to reach back into the past and slap yourself once or twice or ten times?

...loved someone so much that your heart fills to bursting with love every time that they smile?

...tried being stern with someone who doesn't know the meaning of stern so they just laugh when you say "No!" and you can't help but to laugh and hug and kiss them because they're only 8 months old and don't really care that their wiggling around is interfering with your hair-styling abilities?

...gone to pick up a little someone from daycare and seen the hugest, brightest smile a little someone could have, then heard their infectious giggle as you got closer to them and finally experienced the pure joy of a baby who is ecstatic to see their mother when you scoop the little someone up in your arms? o-m-jeez, i can't think of a more AH-MAAAA-ZING feeling in this world.

...rocked a little someone to sleep, fully intending to put them in the bed in five minutes, and end up holding them for the entire duration of their two-hour nap, maybe or maybe not falling asleep yourself? there's something so incredibly peaceful about watching a baby sleep...

...just started writing with no particular direction in mind and spill out a few pieces of your soul onto the keyboard? if not, you really should...even if you're the only one reading it, it's always better to release your burdens and hurts and pains rather than carrying them around with you. it gets really heavy after a while...

...run out of relevant things to say so you keep saying the same thing a bunch of different ways hoping no one will notice what you're doing, then finally decide to just stop and leave well enough alone?

for me, the answer is yes to all of the above. and you? :)

-procrastinating elle

PS: Gee has TWO TEETH! she won't let me get good pictures of them though, lol, but as soon as she does, you will see them. just as i thought she couldn't get any more adorable... :)

road trip!

This past weekend, Gee and I traveled to Fayetteville, AR, to visit friends. The last time we went, Gee was only 4 months old. I had to stop an hour and a half in to feed her, and she couldn't even sit up yet. This time, I only had to stop an hour and a half in to change her diaper. HOWEVER, she cried for 30 minutes before we got to our checkpoint in Russellville. In those 30 minutes, I stopped about 4 times to give her acetaminophen, give her orajel, fix her some milk, give her some apple juice, readjust her toys, ANYTHING to get her to stop crying. None of it worked. So the last 10 miles, after trying to soothe her with my voice (to no avail), I drove in silence as Gee got louder and louder. We finally made it to the campus of Arkansas Tech, where we picked up my sister Toots. I hopped out of the car and checked on Gee; as soon as she saw my face, the crying ceased. I figured she was just glad to be still for awhile. I told Toots to get in the back with Gee, and as soon as I closed the door, the crying resumed. I scurried to get in the back and ordered my sister to drive while I sat next to Gee and let her play with my fingers. Mama's poor baby just wanted to see my face. Talk about feeling loved :) We had a nice lunch with Toots and her boo, and Gee had a first taste of French fries (which she loved, of course). Then, it was time to get back in the road. I prayed that Gee would sleep for the remaining hour and a half of the trip; she was knocked out not even 10 minutes after leaving Russellville, and she didn't wake up until I turned onto the Razorback Road exit; who says God doesn't answer prayers? And did I mention that Gee has one of her bottom teeth coming in? Hence the acetaminophen and orajel; I promise I wasn't giving her drugs just for the heck of it...

Anyways, we arrived safely in Fay. We visited some friends on campus first, then went to our weekend residence: a house occupied by 2 of my line sisters. Gee and I spent more time at the house this time, just relaxing and napping. A teething baby especially needs her rest, and Gee is so busy checking out her surroundings most of the time that she can no longer sleep with a lot of people around. That being said, though, we still got in a lot of quality time with people we haven't seen in a while. I was especially excited about seeing A & G2. A had G2 in November, and after Facebook stalking each other, we became FB BFFs, therefore making Gee (G1) and G2 BFFs by default. They just had to meet. So Gee and I went over to A's house, where we stayed for almost 2 hours, swapping stories of young single mommyhood and marveling over how precious each others babies were. Before we left, of course we had to get pics of the new friends. Cutest thing ever. The weekend ended with church, sushi and a highly motivating conversation with one of my LSs. We hit the road Monday morning and made it safely home.

How motivating was that convo, you ask? Today at work, while the kiddos watched videos, I handwrote 10.5 pages of the first draft of my personal statement as part of my application to the M.Ed. in Student Affairs program at the University of Arkansas. I feel comfortable enough to speak it out loud, write it down, and say it proud because I now KNOW in what direction I want my life to go, and I got the mojo to get Gee and me there. It is now officially grind time for this mama, mostly thanks to our road trip. So watch me work! :D

-love elle&gee

PS: here's a picture taken right before we left Fay. can you say fro'TASTIC!? the hair is crazy, people!
[caption id="attachment_66" align="aligncenter" width="224" caption="who ever heard of an 8-month-old with this much hair? "][/caption]

oh SNAP!

almost forgot. Gee's teeth are on the verge of a breakthrough! the Christmas drama was a false alarm. whenever Gee smiles or talks (or screams, whatever), you can see two little bumps in the middle of her bottom gum. YES!!! she's not putting up as much fuss as i thought she would, but don't tell her because i'm not complaining At All. just had to throw that in there! :D

-love elle&gee

big girl Gee

sooo, mama's baby is 6 months now, and i figure i should probably blog more often (for real this time), b/c she's growing super-duper fast and i don't want to miss anything! Gee now eats apples, carrots, pears, bananas, and sweet potatoes with rice cereal or oatmeal. she also (semi-) drinks from a sippy cup. it's the funniest thing to feed her because she's always grabbing the spoon; trying to feed herself already, can we say GROWN!? lol :) and ya'll, i could promise that Gee says "mama" sometimes, or at least "ma". her babbling consists of most of the consonant sounds, and she has so much variation in her voice. she's just like a little grown-up! oh yeah, and she hardly likes to be held anymore. little miss Gee wants to get down on the floor and roll around. a couple of days ago, i sat her down on the floor and she tried to pull her self up to standing using my leg! and teething update: no teeth yet, but i may be feeling a top tooth. Gee won't let me look at it, though. she always sticks out her tongue when i try to look. so we may or may not have some front teeth for Christmas; a lot can happen in 3 days!

and ya'll, Gee's hair: it's freaking amazing. pretty much the longest, thickest hair i have ever seen on a baby, and i don't say that to brag, i promise. and talk about tenderheaded? Lawd have mercy! Gee did let me comb it with no fuss this morning, but most times she bucks her head back or tries to snatch the comb from my hand or just leans back and looks at me with those big, brown, bright eyes as if to say "now, mama, you know i don't like this. don't do this to me!" but i don't have a choice. no matter how much she screams, i comb 'til all the tangles and knots are gone. if Gee goes one morning or night w/o getting her hair combed, it is NOT a pretty sight......... i'm already using toddler shampoo and detangler/curl definer. i'm scared of our hair future lol!

i think that puts us pretty up-to-date with Gee's development. as for me? meh, who wants to hear about my boring life? when i have some exciting news, ya'll will know. until next time... :)

love, elle&gee

Fatneck Baby Bibs!

ok, so that last post was from 2 weeks ago, but I just realized that I didn't publish it. real smart, mama. anyways, let me tell you about our bib dilemma. Gee baby has one of the fattest (yet adorable) necks ever!! she's just about outgrown all of her bibs, and I'm on a wild goose chase trying to find some bibs with wider neckholes. I've decide that I may have to design my own brand of bibs: Fatneck Baby Bibs! call me mean, but I don't mean it demeaningly. Gee has a fat neck; it's a fact. and Fatneck Baby Bibs! would allow both of us (and any other mothers of fatneck babies) to breathe a little easier. just a few more centimeters of fabric in the bib loop and voila!
too bad I'm not too business savvy and I'm way too lazy to put this idea to work. because it'd probably be a hit. but hey, you never know....

ANYWHO, guess who's sitting up? and talking my ear off! and teething like crazy...I fully expect to see a tooth by Christmas. if I don't, both me and Gee might go crazy, poor baby. she's crankiest right before bedtime, and she fights that sleep so tough! who could she have gotten that from...lol. well enough of my babbling. this was just an off-the-dome post; next one will be better! hopefully. maybe. improbably. ciao!