t.f.t.p. tuesday: sweet summertime.

ya'll should already know what "t.f.t.p." means... if not, please reference this post. lol. now that we have that out of the way, let's talk Memorial Day weekend! all 6 of us Wilson kids [if you include Gee] had some fun in the sun as we swam Monday morning away. Gee was only out there for 30 minutes, and she got browner than i've ever gotten in my life! don't believe me? see for yourself:

this weekend was one not only of brown-ness, but also of some major milestones [in my eyes, anyway]. sweet baby Gee no longer uses a pacifier OR drinks formula!! let me tell you, the latter development was a much easier transition than the former. story time! because i know ya'll love my stories...lol :) Saturday, Gee and i went over to Old Ben Ivery's [my grandpa's] house to pick up some things for my apartment [*insert excited squeal here*]. when i got home, i realized that i had left Gee's pacifier over there. seeing as i was already settled in at the house and had no intentions of leaving again that night, i figured that must have been a sign for me to try and get Gee to go to sleep without it. that was the only thing she was using it for, anyways; she was rarely using the pacifier during the day anymore. so when bedtime rolled around, about 9:30ish pm, Gee sat in the recliner with her PawPaw, screaming in sleep delirium. she'd had her dinner and her bedtime cup of milk; there wasn't much else we could do but rock her and listen to her scream. she kept twisting around trying to look at me, so i figured she needed her mommy to put her to sleep [lol]. i took her in the kitchen, fixed her a cup of water, and sat on the couch in the den where it was cool and quiet. she calmed down and drank the water, and i could tell she was full, but she still kept sucking on the cup, as if it were a paci. when i tried to take it from her, she started screaming again, so i gave it back to her, and she stopped. but she didn't put it back in her mouth. so i took her in our room and sat in the rocking chair. she kept a tight grip on the cup, but as i rocked and talked and sang and shushed, she eventually drifted off into dreamland. she finally relaxed her grip on the cup enough for me to take it out of her hands. i figured it was finally safe to put her in her crib. however, when i did, she promptly woke up and started screaming again. i picked her back up and swayed and shushed and sang some more until she calmed down. then i put her back in the crib and rocked her and rubbed her belly. voila! sleeping baby with no pacifier. was it difficult? yeah duh!!! but it was time. if there's one thing i can't stand, it's an older toddler [18-36 months] walking around with a paci in their mouth. while i was still pregnant, i was determined that my baby would NOT be one of those kids. mission accomplished :D

ok, story time is over! now enjoy some more Memorial Day pics:

mommy, baby, and auntie :)

Uncle Caleb

the Wilson kiddos!

us again! :)

coming up soon: a reflection on what i've learned while working with 1st and 2nd graders for the past two weeks, and how i can apply it to my planned career path...sounds interesting, right? :) until next time!

-love elle&gee-

*le sigh*

Gee and i go on a road trip, and the poor baby blog gets kicked to the curb...along with my lists...and the "Day in the Life" posts...wah wah wah. just another day (or week) in the life of a blog; get over it! LOL, i'll get back on the job, just as soon as i recover from the weekend. do you know the last time i stayed out past 4 in the morning? yeah, with the exception of this past Saturday, neither do i. it's Wednesday, and yes, i'm STILL recovering. i am a total homebody, but as long as my body is home with my baby, i'm kool with it :) i have no clue how long it will take to catch up on the Lists; i have them written out already, so i may just post them in raw list form, and post the journaling later...if they ever come into existence. ha. it's past my bedtime already, so i'll leave you with this:

for the past week or so, Gee has started whining around 12, 12:30am. i pick her up, she goes back to sleep. i put her back in the crib, she whines. i pick her up and put her in the bed with me, we go to sleep. so i sort of feel like she's enforcing my bedtime...and i sort of like it. lol. what do i need to stay up late for anyways? i'd rather shnuggle with my pumpkin. (all together now:) "awwwwwww" hehe :) love that girl!

-love elle&gee-

choice.

Gee is sleeping like the baby who inspired the phrase "sleeping like a baby." Whereas I am doing everything but trying to go to sleep. Insomnia? I don't quite know. Of late, I've just felt this intense urge to really and truly pull my life and myself together, not in a false way that will only last for a week or two, but a true lifestyle change. Organizing documents, pulling helpful articles out of magazines, getting an individual bank account that's not jointed with either of my parents. For whatever reason, the little me in my brain decided that it was time for both of us to get shaking on the path to independent adulthood. In the process of cleaning out my purse, I came across something that I wrote back in December while I was at work. I usually have so many thoughts going in my brain that I can't decide which ones to write down, so I write nothing. But this time, I had to get these words on paper. You may or may not agree with them; it doesn't matter. Just respect that this is my opinion, and everyone is entitled to one.

[begin writing]
"and she realized that, though the activities that she participated in that led to her child's conception weren't very smart, her decision to give her daughter life was the best choice she had ever made." -LW '10.

being a mother is a choice. just because you threw up this morning, went to get a stick to pee on and got a positive result doesn't make you a mother. it just makes you pregnant. probably. and when you confirm that you have a group of cells multiplying in your abdomen, like it or not, you have (as far as i know) 3 options: abort, give up or raise up. i don't believe in abortion for myself. as for others, they're the ones who have to live with their decisions, not me. BUT, and this is imperative: A DECISION NOT TO ABORT IS *NOT* A DECISION TO BE A MOTHER. a woman who - knowing that she could never properly raise a child - gives her baby up for adoption is a better mother than a woman who carries a child resentfully and raises that child in hate. to be a mother is to see your daughter for the very first time and already know that you'd do anything for her. to fell her pain when she gets her shots and her heart beat when you hold her tight, realizing that her heartbeat and yours are perfectly in sync. to know that from her first breath to (Lord willing) your last, all that you have you now share, and you'll never be able to make another decision without first thinking of how it would affect her. a true mother's (not egg donor's) love is completely unconditional, and her life is now lived for two. when you think about it, it's not unlike a marriage now: for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health... if you would vow to stick by a man through these things, wouldn't you do that and more for your own flseh and blood? a mother would. keep this in mind also: every woman who ahs given birht is NOT a mother, and every mother has NOT given birth. so, as previously stated, motherhodd is a choice. i've made mine.
-LW, 12-01-10 (Wednesday)

Just needed to get that off my chest and into cyberspace. And yes, I do know that I never posted for Gee's 8-month G*DAY. That post is coming tomorrow. Only 2 weeks late... :D

new year, semi-new elle, same ole gee :D

sooo, i kept telling myself that i would blog about Christmas no more than 2 or 3 days after Christmas. totally didn't happen. sooo, here we go:

***CHRISTMAS 2010***
because of Gee and Gee only, our household put up Christmas lights and a big tree this year (from which it can [correctly] be inferred that neither of those have been put up for a while...lol). so Gee got to take a few home pics in her GORGEOUS holiday dress (a navy blue w/silver polka dots and fuschia tulle, courtesy of gap.com) in front of the tree. we had family come in starting the Thursday before Christmas; poor Gee didn't sleep normally until they left! she woke up several times throughout the night EVERYNIGHT from 12/23 - 12/29. perceived teething pains did NOT help matters. but anyways, back to the festivities...

christmas morning. ridiculous amount of presents under the tree. most of whom were for who? GEE!! my daddy decided that we would take turns opening presents, starting with the youngest: Gee. so that went on for a while, and she (i) opened clothes, toys, books, more clothes, more toys, etc. until finally she (i) ended up having to open one of her presents between everyone else opening presents. ridiculous! but she seemed to enjoy everything, and modeled her new jeggings outfit for the rest of the day; gotta tell ya, baby jeggings have to be THE most adorable thing ever!! but anyways... :)

so yeah, Christmas was great. nice, intimate, family-centered. lovely. new year's eve at our house is never very eventful, and this year was no different. Gee slept the new year in, and i worked on a paper until 3:30am while waiting for my sister Toots to get home from fourth meal at Huddle House (yuck). for a few years now, i haven't made any new year's resolutions. this year wasn't really different, but i did post this on The Book:

""

just kidding. apparently, The Book deleted it or something, so now i can't copy it verbatim. #wack. but basically, it said that i'm grateful to see 2011, i learned a LOT of life's lessons in 2010, and that this year will be one of application. a lesson isn't *truly* learned until you use it, so i plan to do a lot of using in the near future. and amazingly, things are getting done. slowly but surely. i did a lot of talking to myself last year, as in trying to hype myself up, bringing myself down, and building myself back up. not like schizo-16 voices in the head talking to myself. although it could be compared to that...

yeah ok, i'm rambling again, so i guess that means bedtime. i just realized i didn't talk a WHOLE lot about Gee in this post, so real quick: she's saying "mama". sure, it's in between the rest of the "mamamamamamamas", but so? lol, and apparently she's scooting around daycare. life's been hectic this week with my parents gone on a cruise and me, Toots, Gee, and our friend Cee taking care of the house and my brothers, so Gee hasn't gotten much opportunity to roll and scoot around. i'm working on it. i mean, there's sooo many different aspects to motherhood, and so many things that, when you're pregnant, seem like you'll have all the time in the world to do with your child. but time passes so quickly, and you realize that oh crap! you haven't been reading your child to sleep every night. you might let them watch too much tv. then, you realize how much you love your child and how hard you're trying to be the best mother you can be, and you know that it's all good. your kiddo won't be mad at you for missing a few things here and there. as long as they get it eventually. :)

mama loves the baby! -elle&gee

PS: working on posting more often. just can't get used to iPhone typing (still missing the BlackBerry keyboard); it'll happen soon, though. :D